Mile and Ounces castigate new style politics

David Mile, senior official at the Toadwatch Foundation, has written to the Toadish Policy Institute castigating Britain’s track record in modernising its politicians.

The people of Seahaven have shown the way and that is embarrassing for a modern and forward looking nation like Britain.

Mr. Mile thinks that the current situation is confusing and a national embarrassment:

We have a halfway system in this country where on the one hand we have sensible politicians who are hardworking and in tune with the demands of the Great British public and on the other we have politicians like Lord Kinnock.

Simon Half-Inch, policy researcher at the institute said:

Well, you have to admit Mr. Mile has a point. We have all kinds of politicians and dignitaries visiting this country and they don’t know from one minute to the next whether they will be dealing with a serious politician or a complete idiot. It’s awkward.

Mile went further and drew upon the recent experiences of the Ounce family who recently held a dinner party to celebrate their return to Britain after more than a decade overseas:

I am in full agreement with the Ounces. Many politicians seem to not only have lost their way in recent years they also seem to have lost their minds.

The Ounces are known for their outspoken remarks on the way the face of British politics has changed over the relatively short period they have been away.

It’s like a bad dream. When we first went to live abroad we thought the way their politicians did things was actually funny. Italy was a hoot and Sweden was like some kind of surreal dream. We felt sorry for the ordinary people having to put up with all that nonsense from their elected representatives. Well, the blood simply drained from our faces when we came back. It’s all gone mental.

Lord Gram, a close friend and ally of Lord Kinnock remarked:

Well, you know, ummmmm.

Posted by John at February 23, 2006 10:25 AM | TrackBack