June 30, 2004
You boy! Yes you! Are you speaking English!!?
Via Tim Blair we have this bit of news.
A BOY of three had a full-time nursery place taken away partly because he speaks English and has a garden, says his mum.This cannot be true, can it?
In defence of the school the head mistress said:
"...they are not the sole criteria."That, however, does not change the fact that speaking the lingo and having a garden are counted as negatives for a placement. Man, having stuff is really beginning to suck these days. It's....it's....such a disadvantage.
My advice to Nicki, the boys mum, is to sell the house, buy a caravan and throw loads of stuff out of the window. Then visit this school head and tell her that you've got some left over tarmac and can do a quality job on her drive for a few bob, cash in hand.
That should sort it.
June 29, 2004
Needs oil
I have noticed something odd with blogspot based blogs recently. Many of them seem to be stuck. For instance last week the House of Dumb seemed to stop updating on Tuesday June 15th only to start again on Wednesday the following week. No big deal, you might think, but magically the Wednesday update included some never previously seen Sunday June 20th postings.
Something similar is happening with the plastic gangster. Posting seemed to stop last Thursday only to start again this Tuesday with some Monday postings.
Like I said. Stuck. Or at least sticking a bit.
One day they will be dragged into the real world
Here they go again.
The BBC is setting out its vision for how it should work in the 21st Century as part of the charter review process.No doubt they will drone on about their ‘quality’ programming and their world renowned ‘impartial’ news service.
One of their intelligensia was on radio 5 live this morning saying how programmes such as Strictly Come Dancing would not have been made if it wasn’t for the BBC finance model. Sheesh. Another innocent radio gets shouted at.
What they will never admit to getting, because they fear for their protection money, is that regardless of the quality of their output their funding model is sickening.
On my bike
I’ve been exercising. Yes, yes, I know. Also, I’ve cut right back on the mid-week drinking though I confess to a couple of glasses of red last night. This has been going on for just a little over three weeks now.
I’m not sure of how or when I made the decision to do this but I do know that I have been reflecting in recent months upon the sedentary nature of my daily life.
I get up in the morning, wash and dress, climb into the car and drive to work. I sit at my desk for the required length of time and then do the same in reverse excluding the un-washing. Then I put on something more comfortable and relax back into family life. We chat, make dinner, eat and do general family stuff until the little one goes to bed. I would call him the Little Englander but he is quite expansionist in nature and would, I feel, prefer a reborn British Empire to the current state of affairs. Then there is a little wine (sometimes more than a little), a bit of TV, a bit of computer time and maybe some gaming. Or whatever takes our fancy. Usually there is very little in the way of traditional exercise except once every two weeks when I spend 6 or 7 hours running around the woods, hiding in bushes, and crawling through the undergrowth.
So, one day, I got back from work and hopped on the bike and I have been doing this each weekday for three weeks. Only about 20 – 30 minutes an evening but that’s something, at least. Enough to make me feel a little more energetic and a little less wasted during the occasional high energy withdrawal from my low energy resources.
I know what you’re thinking. The government made him do it, he’s been listening to their propaganda. Turncoat. Sweet mother, he’s one of THEM!. I assure you that’s not the case. The recent government campaign for regular exercise had only one effect and that involved the shouting of expletives at an unfortunate radio only doing what it was designed to do. No, this has been a long time coming, in the same way that my waistline has.
So there it is. Like so many have advised me to do in the past I am finally on my bike. It won’t last; I know myself well enough to say that, but for now it is something that I do. Slowly.
Tom, over at The Trout Also Rises does cycling properly. 215 miles in June alone!
June 28, 2004
Don't call him a politician
Here's an interesting Times article on Paul Sykes, the chap who has been bankrolling the UK Independence Party. We like him a lot over here at The England Project.
That softy Blunkett
Our dear Home Secretary, David 'Nailer' Blunkett does has a soft side to him. For instance, he loves animals:
David Blunkett, who has been widely criticised as Home Secretary for refusing to take tough action against violent animal rights activists, is revealed today as a supporter of a leading anti-vivisection charity.
My crumbling world
My psion series 5mx palmtop computer finally popped its clogs this weekend. It seems that it has fallen victim to the dreaded ribbon cable problem which basically means the screen no longer works. This is not a fault that I can work around.
For those of you that do not know, the psion series 5mx is a brilliantly designed machine that went out of production some time back. The collection of features that it delivers make it unbeatable, even though it is a bit long in the tooth. It has a full office suite, diary, contacts, text editors, sketching software, voice recording, touch sensitive screen, alarms, database management system, games, spell checker, thesaurus, calculator, a port for an additional flash card, email (not that I use it), and a web browser (ditto) and a brilliant operating system called Epoch. That’s just out of the box. You can also install oodles of third party software.
Its two best features, however, are its astonishingly good slide out keyboard and its ability to turn on instantly. You really do have to see and use that keyboard to know what I mean. It’s fantastic.
So I really don’t have a choice but to get it repaired at a cost of around £80 plus postage. Shame, because I would much rather put that money towards a newer better machine but I can't because no such machine exists. Except, perhaps, the psion series 7 but that falls a little outside of the palmtop size range and is also no longer made.
Ernest provides a link to this, Perfect guide to disassemble Psion 5mx. Lots of pictures.
Alternatively I could use this guy who seems to offer a reasonable deal at £45 job done.
June 25, 2004
Musical taste
Here's mine, right out of the 80's in the form of the greatest of the Scorpion albums.
Album: Love at first sting
And now, from the greatest Scorpion album comes the second greatest Scorpions song of all time.
I'm still loving you ...Of course, the lack of sound does not do the song justice.
I'm still loving you ...
I'm still loving you ...
I'm still loving you ...Still Loving You Baby
It goes without saying that the greatest ever Scorpions song of all time is China White:
How long will it takeOnce again, the lack of sound lets it down. I can tell you though that the guitar riff on this song defines the instrument. Of that there is no question.
To make the world a flaming star
How long will it take
Till they stop their senseless wars
How long will it take
Till everybody will understand
That we need to fill our hearts with love again
So, go on. If you were musically challenged in the 80's and you're a blogger give us a whiff of what you were into. It's good to share.
A stony silence falls across the room...
Is someone standing up to the Home Secretary?
Humberside Police Authority has asked the home secretary to reconsider his decision to order the suspension of its chief constable David Westwood.How dare these ... these ... these "Policemen" make such a request of our glorious Home Secretary. Now, step aside lest ye all get a nailing.
They've fleshed out the story a bit now. Apparently:
"What we don't want, and the worst possible outcome, would be Gunfight in OK Corral in Humberside between the police authority, the chief constable and the Home Secretary."I agree. There are better venues than Humberside.
If Antoine Clarke had his way the coppers would be up against the Home Secretaries Saudi counterpart, which would present them with a far greater challenge I think.
Given that today is Update Friday I give you this David Nailer Blunkett response via The Scotsman:
“In the absence of any new arguments I have decided to maintain my decision and I now call upon the authority to comply with the law and suspend Mr Westwood.I can't see this ending any other way that the Police Authority backing down. They really have no choice and, frankly, regardless of how ridiculous the Home Secretary is this is not the right way to go about things.“If they do not I will be taking the necessary legal steps at the earliest opportunity at the beginning of next week to require them to do so.”
What they actually have an issue with is the law under which Nailer Blunkett is calling them out. It would be crass for me to point out to them that they are not the only people to suffer under legislation with which they do not agree. I will point it out anyway.
A tale of two cultures
In Britain, before you can visit violence upon a criminal who has already proved their own propensity towards the delivery of violence you need to enter into a contractual arrangement whereby the criminal signs a waiver form which you need to countersign and then deliver, in triplicate, to the relevant government department giving three weeks advance notice. The department will then review the documentation the top copy of which, with a bit of luck and a strong tailwind, will be delivered back to you stamped with the relevant “Self Defence Approved” mark. After that point the criminal is toast.
In America you can shoot the fucker in his sleep.
Erm....
...I thought the Swiss were supposed to be neutral.
I know, I know, it's easy to complain and blame the referee. That's why I'm doing it.
June 24, 2004
Getting our email back
If guilty, five years in prison plus a $250,000 fine is the least that this spammer deserves. I’ve had it up to here with him and his kind and no longer consider spam as a mere nuisance. It’s theft; theft of my time and my families time. It dramatically lessens the value of a service that I pay for and that I used to value highly until Mr. Jason Smathers and his kind crept out from under whatever stone it was they were hiding.
Even after significant effort on my part which delivered promising results early on I still receive more spam than I can comfortably handle though, thankfully, the viral payloads have been well and truly eliminated.
To his sentence I would add one of those orders that prevents technology criminals from using a computer. Even touching one would send the bugger back to the nick. He is a serious technology criminal whose actions and greed have adversely affected the lives of, probably, millions of individuals across the planet. He deserves to be made an example of, the tosser.
June 23, 2004
Judge Blunkett
This is a strong article by Jenkins in the Times. He concerns himself with the case of Garry Mann, the English fireman given a two year (suspended as it turns out) sentence by the Portuguese authorities and the reaction of the Home Secretary to Mr. Mann's current "not behind bars" status.
It looks like a right royal mess with evidence of an unfair trial and a complete misunderstanding as to the legal status of Mr. Mann by the Home Secretary who famously said, though not in a Judge Dredd voice:
Jenkins is right when he says:
Garry Mann might not invite sympathy, which is why his case is a good test of justice.If Blunkett had any sense he would drop this ridiculous crusade of his as soon as possible unless, of course, he believes that Mr. Mann's "trial" was a fair one in which case one would have to wonder about his suitability for the position he currently wields.
The judges are insisting that the trial was a fair one that followed all necessary procedures. The plot deepens and only time will reveal the true situation.
I may have jumped in here a little too soon and I put this down to not thinking very much of our Home Secretary, who I was trying to nail (and I don't mean in that US kind of a way). Thankfully, no one reads what I write so no harm done, eh?
Don't like the messages of the New Testament?
Don't be downhearted. Grab a pen and change the words:
Authorised version: “John did baptise in the wilderness, and preach the baptism of repentance for the remission of sins.”New: “John, nicknamed ‘The Dipper’, was ‘The Voice’. He was in the desert, inviting people to be dipped, to show they were determined to change their ways and wanted to be forgiven.”
Wandering off
"No, wait. Come back. You don't understand! Trust meeeeeeee......."
When a leftie politician - and it nearly always is a leftie politician - explains that a "real public debate" is essential to "raise awareness" on a certain issue, it's a pretty safe bet that what he really means is that most people disagree with him, and thus a widespread propaganda campaign is necessary to educate those poor unenlightened souls. - Peter Cuthbertson
June 22, 2004
Moore is less
Christopher Hitchens on Fahrenheit 9/11:
However, I think we can agree that the film is so flat-out phony that "fact-checking" is beside the point. And as for the scary lawyers—get a life, or maybe see me in court. But I offer this, to Moore and to his rapid response rabble. Any time, Michael my boy. Let's redo Telluride. Any show. Any place. Any platform. Let's see what you're made of.
June 21, 2004
Good luck rocketman
All this talk of space ships reminds me of that Star Trek film where there's that guy who builds and launches the first ship with that, you know, special engine. What was his name? Eddie Cochran or something.
The more I read about it the more special the day feels.
Good luck to the ground crew and good luck to Mike Melvill. I'm sure that he's done everything he can to ensure that the trip is a safe one but that doesn't stop him being a very brave man indeed.
Spinpapers
The Times: Madonna wins right to keep riff-raff out.
The Guardian: Madonna loses fight to bar ramblers.
June 19, 2004
Beer sales up
Weekly sales of beer from British supermarkets have doubled in the run-up to Euro 2004, research suggests.What's that in pints?Market specialists TNS said shoppers bought 23 million litres in one week in May - and this went up to 46 million litres before Euro 2004.
June 18, 2004
How those boundaries do bend
As the Purple Crusader said, the boundaries of the law are flexible. It seems that the member of Fathers 4 Justice who threw that condom filled with four at the PM has been arrested again, this time for breaching his bail conditions.
You see the father, Ron Davis, has been banned from the City of Westminster but was caught entering it earlier today. Plod were there in an instant and nabbed the guy.
What a great job, you might think. The coppers must have really been on the ball. A great job keeping such a water tight ring of impregnability around the City. Oh yeah?
…he arrived at today's Fathers' Day march in a bus which passed into the Westminster area.Glen Poole, a spokesman for the group, said the police had deliberately re-routed the bus away from the Camden side of Lincoln's Inn Field in central London to the Westminster half.
Mr Poole said the police took Davis to a sign in the square and pointed to the Westminster post code.
He said: "They have arrested him for breach of bail conditions - a situation they appear to have manipulated."
The British-American War
Did you know that today, in 1812, the US congress declared war on the UK? In response the British burnt down the White House. What was all that about?.
On that anti-gun crime conference
I've been thinking a little more about the national conference to be held by the British Association for Shooting and Conservation in partnership with Mothers Against Guns. I called it brilliant. There are a number of reasons why I think this initiative is a good one, or at the very least has potential:
- We all know or strongly suspect that firearm legislation is not affective and hasn't been for some time. If the initiative is, in truth, an attempt at finding new answers then this can only be a good thing.
- A shooting organisation is running the conference (in partnership at least). It can set the anti-gun crime agenda of the conference and can therefore devote its time to arguing a constructive case rather than finding itself on the back foot, having to defend itself from anti-shooting sports propaganda. Having control over the agenda is a crucial advantage.
- The "dark and powerful gun lobby" are seen as taking gun crime seriously (which, of course, they always have done). It lessens any argument that they are selfish, and only interested in keeping their guns to the detriment of society.
- Decisions, conclusions drawn at the conference can be used in later arguments or contributions. The fact that these conclusions, or what have you, were arrived at in partnership with Mothers against Guns may help to give the arguments a little more weight.
- Mothers against Guns and the BASC hate gun crime and want to contribute to reducing it and its affects on society. A partnership conference like this helps confirm that fact.
- The press have their dirty lying nadgers snipped. The best of them will be able to spin this, but they will have to work really hard to do so and we all know that they are intellectually lazy bastards.
- Someone is marginalized. Can you guess who it is yet?
Last nights footy
I have two observations to make about the England v Switzerland match. Firstly England played poorly. Secondly, the Swiss seemed to have had trouble standing up.
Top of the evil tree
I suspected as much. It turns out that Iain Murray is evil after all. Not just a little bit evil either. He’s the main man. The big cheese. The dog’s nadgers, as it were.
Iain Murray, or should I
say Dr. Ian Murry!
You know those little blogging breaks he’s been having recently? Yup, that’s when he works on his secret evil wind machine.
So, which country gets it first Iain. France or Italy?
June 17, 2004
Is the penny dropping?
Britain’s leading shooting organisation, the British Association for Shooting and Conservation (BASC) and the anti gun-crime group Mothers Against Guns are to jointly host a national conference to seek new policies in the fight against armed crime.New answers! Exactly. The old and tragically unsuccessful methods of legislating against the law abiding have failed. It looks like at least one anti-gun crime group have realised this....
"Mothers Against Guns has no objection to law abiding shooting and we hope that through co-operation with responsible organisations such as the BASC, we can find new answers."
Could it be that the dangerous dinosaurs have finally been rumbled? It certainly looks like a step in the right direction.
Purple Crusader in North East rampage
The pressure group, Fathers 4 Justice, have created a new character called the Purple Crusader. His mission? To carry out a campaign of traffic disruption in the North East of England and to spread the groups message (if you don't know who Fathers 4 Justice are then go here).
A police spokesman has issued the following warning to the Crusader:
Everyone has the right to peaceful protest and to make their views known, but any protests must be carried out within the boundaries of the law. Any breaches of the law will be dealt with.To which the Purple Crusader, resplendent in his flowing satin cape, replied:
Earthman, you do not frighten me with your talk of your laws and its boundaries . Boundaries are as flexible as the fabric of the Universe. You yourselves have taught us this.You failed to trap Spiderman with your inept boundary shifting shenanigans and you will fail to trap me.
I am the Purple Crusader! I have the powder!
June 16, 2004
Shame brought to Crumpsall Lane Primary school in north Manchester
When I was a very young child I spent a great deal of time in Italy visiting family. So much so that, on occasion, I was out of school for weeks at a time. That was then, this is now:
An eight year old girl was expelled after her parents took her out of school for a holiday.So the school threw her out.Victoria Corry was absent for 11 teaching days - one more than is allowed under government guidelines.
Crumpsall Lane Primary school eventually re-admitted the girl after a number of days of negotiation with her parents who, presumably, were a little pissed that their daughter was being punished for no good reason whatsoever.
I wonder how many actual hours (or minutes) of education time the poor girl missed out on during her time away.
This is a stealth post
Dumb Jon speaks about the apparent stealth racism in the police force:
Ooooh…that's the worst kind. Racism for which there is no actual evidence at all. You need special techniques to expose them, for example many racists can't detect if you put salt in their tea because they don't have taste buds like normal people, also many racists own cats and big cauldrons, and if you tie them up, then throw them in a pond, they'll float instead of drowning.I was once turned into a newt by one of these racists. I got better.
June 15, 2004
In our eyes
Iris scanning devices are to be fitted at major UK airports within a year according to the Home Office. Who is providing the technology and how much is it costing?
The Home Office has signed a five-year contract with French company Sagem SA to provide the iris-recognition system, but Mr Browne [Immigration Minister] would not reveal the cost on the grounds of "commercial confidentiality".On the grounds of it's none of our business what the government spends our money on more like.
Frankly, this answer is not even close to acceptable.
Little England
We hear about it on BBC radio chat shows and we read about it in the press but where exactly is Little England? Does it have anything to do with Middle England? Has its inhabitants ever invaded France or, at the very least sunk any French shipping?
Details are sketchy but piecing together the various clues given to us by the media we can say for sure that its indigenous population are known as Little Englanders and not, surprisingly enough, The Little English. Here is an example of Little Englander usage that I include as a confirming reference (supplied by Peter Briffa in the public interest):
"Put out more St George's flags! England may have lost the football last night, but for Little Englanders it was a night to celebrate". – Polly Toynbee of the Guardian newspaper.From this single reference and its later context it would be easy to believe that Little England is part of the European continent, that they recently played England at football and that they won, hence their night of celebrations. But, though revealing, this hardly pinpoints Little England’s actual position inside Europe. Anyone can beat England at football. It could be anywhere. Near Italy perhaps or maybe Greece.
All very confusing, but not hopelessly so. You see we do have a reference work available to us which gives us a solid clue as to the provenance of Little England. It comes in the form of a Handbook discovered by one of The England Projects researchers on an intrepid adventure around a car boot sale in Surrey.
That is a picture of Winston Churchill on the front cover. He was the British Prime Minister during the second word war. Could it be that Little England is actually part of Britain, you know, like the Isle of White is? Could it be that Little Englanders are, in fact, Englishmen? If so then why are not all Englishmen also known as Little Englanders? What makes them different? What characteristic or behavioural defect turns an Englishman into a Little Englander?
The Webster dictionary has it and that it has taken us this long to realise it is indicative of the calibre of our researchers.
A little Englander is:
an Englishman opposed to territorial expansion. See Anti-imperialism.We were right to pick up on the clues on the cover of the Handbook.
A Little Englander is an English anti-imperialist. Someone who is in opposition to imperialism and, as a result, someone who is unlikely to have sunk anyone’s shipping let alone that of the French.
The media are right to bang on about these Little Englanders. They are dangerously delusional people probably of the Extreme Left. Any right thinking person who takes the time to look at the issues properly would soon come to appreciate that British imperialism is the future.
A continent ruled from Westminster, with uniform and just laws administered by the British, united under a single currency – Stirling.
That’s the dream that these Little Englanders want to ruin and I say to the Tower with them! To the Tower with them all!
June 14, 2004
I hate you because....
This is the kind of talk you will be hearing over the next few days:
We must learn from this. We must listen to what the electorate has told us. On the big and important issues in Europe, we will be steadfast in our defence of Britain’s national interests.But it is not just the big things is it? It’s also the little things. In fact, I would argue that the little things are a significant cause of the disaffection people feel over Europe because it is those little things that they come into contact with on a regular basis.
Think of it in terms of the reforms on the House of Lords. Now that’s a big and important national issue. So big and important in fact that, for most people, it will have absolutely no measurable impact on their lives whatsoever. Day-to-day, things will be exactly the same for them in spite of what happens to the second chamber. The result? People are not interested in the issue; certainly not so much that it will affect they way they vote.
However, prevent people from buying a certain type of dog food or force them to put up signs warning that snow is slippery and suddenly the EU is right in their faces. The EU constitution may be a big thing to you and me but the average person in the street knows nothing about it. What they do know, however, is that it was drafted by the same guys that are preventing them from buying that bone for their dog and that pisses them off.
So when you hear the kind of talk that we are bound to be exposed to over the next few days and weeks just remember the voter and the things that actually affect them in their day to day lives. When the powerful say that they are listening and that they will learn just sit back and marvel as they fail to do either.
No bone, no EUrope.
June 11, 2004
The dilemma
I should be happy, really I should. Labour are getting such a hiding in the elections that the humanitarian in me wants to shout out “STOP! LET THEM GET UP!”. But I’m not happy.
You see, if this defeat is really down to what people think about the war in Iraq and Tony Blair’s part in it then I simply cannot take any joy from it. How can I?
They say freedom has its price, and it looks like Blair’s career will be part of that price. You just watch as the cowardly creatures of the Labour party stab him in the back and toss him out of number 10.
I won’t be sorry to see him go, but I will be sorry that he was kicked out over the one major thing he did right.
I ribbit
Steven Den Beste asks:
And for the moment we don't think of computers as slaves. But what if we became able to produce computers which were easily able to pass the Turing Test? What if it were possible to produce androids which could pass for human, or come close to it? At what point in the process of development of such units would we have to cease thinking of them as property and start thinking of them as slaves? At what point would we have to consider the possibility that they were entitled to civil rights?My guess is that the point will be reached a couple of decades after the Guardian tells us it is already here, by which time a vacuum cleaner will be editor in chief. The paper will really suck then.
June 10, 2004
Be careful what you wish for
Women feeling a bit like men, finally. I take no pleasure in saying that.
Hang on a minute.
Quote of the day
Sooner or later pretty much everyone with libertarian leanings comes up with the idea of living on the sea in international waters..... - Andrew Case, Transterrestrial Musings.You know, I was thinking the same only yesterday.
Ha! When I read the above at Transterrestrial Musings it had a distinctively familiar feeling about it that I could not quite put my finger on. Yellow, I thought. Anyhow, Lurch, over at Gun Culture nails it.
Man, the mind is some kind of crazy medicine.
Up for a scrap
Having endured the slings, arrows, barbs and whale-harpoons of sustained media hostility, they are the ones who are truly up for a scrap. Phooey to all this dull 'consensus', UKIP are riding into town looking for trouble. Even their list of '5 Essential Freedoms' includes 'Freedom from Political Correctness'. I have no idea what they mean by this and, possibly, neither do they but it's fighting-talk and refreshing as a shower of lemon zest. David Carr - samizdata.net
This from Drake over at The Edge of England's Sword:
Iain's friend claims that Kilroy-Silk has had a huge effect on things. Sorry, colour me un-spun. I've seen very little talk about Kilroy, apart from among the pundit class complaining about UKIP being populated by freaks and loons. Guess what? Message: we don't care. We're not selecting a government, we're selecting a delegation to a parliament whose sovereignty many of us don't recognise in the first place.
June 09, 2004
Polly on the black ships of the British
Polly Toynbee, in the Guardian, warns us of the withdrawal of the British from the lands of Europe:
The symbolic power of that would have an unpredictable trajectory of its own, unleashing forces that are hard to bottle up again. It might finish off any hope of ever winning a referendum on the European constitution: as the rest of the EU moves on this would mark the start of Britain's road to the margins and withdrawal.It's the end of the Third Age Polly! The elves are leaving! What are we to do!?
The elves are leaving, they’re sailing away
All beauty is slowly crossing the sea
What did we fight for? What did we gain?
We can’t ever win. We’ll never be free.
Home office vogon spokesman responds to ID card concerns
The Englishman has a link up to an interesting article on ID cards.
The money quote comes from Mr. Richard Thomas, some kind of Information minister:
This is beginning to represent a really significant sea change in the relationship between state and every individual in this country.Responding to this, a Home Office vogon said:It was now clear the scheme was not just about identity cards but about a national identity register.
It is not just about citizens having a piece of plastic to identify themselves.
It's about the amount, the nature of the information held about every citizen and how that's going to be used in a wide range of activities.
Home Office vogon
To learn more about Home Office vogons visit this wikipedia page:
Here's what to do if you want to get a lift from a Vogon: Forget it. They are one of the most unpleasant races in the galaxy. Not actually evil, but bad tempered, bureaucratic, officious and callous. They wouldn't even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without orders signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public enquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters. The best way to get a drink out of a Vogon is stick your finger down his throat, and the best way to irritate him is to feed his grandmother to the ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal.
June 08, 2004
Integrated?
What do you make of this then?
I feel that the flying of the St George's flag should be banned. There has been such an upsurge in anti-Muslim sentiment, the flying of this racist flag will only make matters worse for everyone. Tony Blair should be brave and outlaw it. - Azim Khan, UK
Shut up
Everyone who contributed to this guide on how to stay healthy when watching the football on the telly should just shut up.
I said shut up!
Especially you Jayne:
To guard against voice damage, fans need to avoid long periods of overuse, drink water or juice and cut down on smoking, alcohol and caffeine.You can shut up too.
Quote of the day
This, by Charles Moore in the Telegraph:
But Lady Thatcher is right that she and Reagan made a good team because "although we shared the same analysis of the way the world worked, we were very different people". She stood for the stern, puritanical side of conservatism - the need to brace up and take the medicine. He stood for the optimistic, open, deeply American side of it - the idea that everything will be all right if only people are trusted to get on with their lives. Mix the two, and you harness the Special Relationship, for the first time in history, to the march of conservative ideas.
Is this what we can expect?
Is this really the measure of the kind of help we can expect from our emergency services if we should find ourselves unfortunate enough to be victims of violent crime?
Whichever way you look at it, they were either incompetent or the answer to the above question is yes.
As David Carr says, by the time the emergency services got to the victims:
…there was definitely no risk to life because the victims were no longer alive.How can we honestly respect those that would choose this course of action while women lay dying?
And if they would not put themselves in danger to help these women what can the rest of us expect?
A disgrace. What a tragic disgrace.
The problem with Howard
Iain Murray sums up Tory European policy in three words: stupid, stupid, stupid. He’s probably right and I probably agree (you probably have commitment problems – Ed). This whole EU issue and Howard’s stated middle ground position is extremely bad for the Tory party on nearly every level.
You see if, as Iain suggests, Howard chose the Euro friendly line to stop a few fat old Tory wets like Ken Clarke criticizing him then Howard has not only handed a bunch of Tories over to the UKIP, myself among them, but he has also revealed himself as an unprincipled leader whose position on the EU is dependent upon the opinion of others and not upon some personally held belief in the EU.
If, after Thursday’s vote, the UKIP does well and there is a subsequent change in the Tory position on the EU as I hoped for here Howard again, though to the EU sceptics advantage, would reveal himself as someone who has no deeply held and principled position. Hollow, if you like.
Alternatively, if Howard really does personally believe in the middle ground in Europe and if many Tory votes do go to the UKIP then he reveals that his position is simply incompatible with that of many natural Tory voters.
Whichever way this goes, Howard has fluffed it.
June 07, 2004
Who are all these sinister people?
The BBC notes:
They are everywhere. It seems you cannot go down any street at the moment without seeing cars, shops, houses and pubs festooned with St George's flags.One would have to assume that if these things are everywhere (which they are, frankly) and if they represent something sinister we could and should be expecting a great deal of trouble in the not too distant future.But are these patriotic displays just an indication of support for the England squad in Euro 2004 or do they represent something else, perhaps something more sinister?
Nope, I’m not expecting any such thing either.
The challenge of our generation
First we had global cooling. Then we had global warming. Now we have super global warming.
What we actually need is a grand unified theory of the environment.
June 05, 2004
Waking with badgers
I woke up this morning from a dream. The last image I remember from it was the front cover of a book which was a hardback covered in a yellow/brown dust sheet. On it was a pencil drawing of a woman holding a baby and next to that, in a thin black script, were the words Abortion and its wayward badger.
I need to lay off something, clearly, but what that something is is anyone's guess.
June 04, 2004
A question
I was asked a seemingly simple question over a drink or two recently by a lady friend of mine who works in the care industry:
Mercy or justice?I wonder what my answer revealed about myself? I suspect, but do not know because I failed to ask, that the answer is suggestive of whether the subject sees themselves as a victim or not. I don't usually dabble in this kind of magic so I could be way off the mark.
Quote of the day
One bleeding-heart type asked me in a recent interview if I did not agree that "violence begets violence." I told him that it is my earnest endeavor to see that it does. I would like very much to ensure - and in some cases I have - that any man who offers violence to his fellow citizen begets a whole lot more in return than he can enjoy. - Jeff Cooper, Cooper VS Terrorism.
Twittering twit
Tony Banks MP, a politician notable for his anti-liberty stance on hunting, would like to draw attention to the fact that he thinks the human race sucks. I mean really, really sucks. He holds the whole species in such disdain that he would like to see every man, woman and child killed in a burning inferno of doom.
How do I know this? Well, in our mechanisms of government there is this thing called an Early Day Motion (or EDM) that an MP can author. Though these EDM's are not expected to be discussed as such, they are a way of bringing an issue to the attention of parliament and they also allow other MP's to add their signature to the motion in support of it.
A kind of, "hey, what do you all think of this then?".
Well, the latest by Tony Banks is a real hum-dinger:
That this House is appalled, but barely surprised, at the revelations in M15 files regarding the bizarre and inhumane proposals to use pigeons as flying bombs; recognises the important and live-saving role of carrier pigeons in two world wars and wonders at the lack of gratitude towards these gentle creatures; and believes that humans represent the most obscene, perverted, cruel, uncivilised and lethal species ever to inhabit the planet and looks forward to the day when the inevitable asteroid slams into the earth and wipes them out thus giving nature the opportunity to start again.This man is in government, responsible for representing his constituents in the House. Ranting such as this should be left to a blog, not an EDM.
Luckily Peter Bottomley MP has added some amendments to the EDM, restoring a little sanity to the House. For instance amendment "EDM 1255A3" which states:
Line 6, leave out from 'earth' to end and insert 'when humans and other creatures may with luck have the chance to live together again.'Man, that's some dream. Banks is already off with the bunnies though. Fluffy fluffy bunnies that can talk and wear clothes like real people.
June 03, 2004
Eventually messengers stop bothering
I think that this lead in the Times fails in its conclusion:
A notable minority (and occasional majority) of voters has opposed British EU membership for three decades. It is not surprising that such voters would wish to express that view in a contest for the European Parliament, which they view as illegitimate. The UKIP won 7 per cent of the national vote (on a dire turnout) in these elections five years ago. But it obtained a mere 1.5 per cent in the general election two years later. In our London poll, the UKIP mayoral contender stands at 2 per cent. A realistic Tory approach to the UKIP would be to concede it will fare well in a European vote, but dismiss it as a caravan of carnival performers. The best thing to do with “gadflies” is not to waste too much energy trying to swat them.But hey, that’s the thing about messages, not getting them is dangerous. If the Tory party fails to get this particular one (if indeed many traditional Tory votes move to the UKIP temporarily) as seemingly advocated by this Times article then the consequences could be far reaching. Who would vote for a party that continually views as legitimate something which they do not?
Single issue politics needs a big issue and not many come as big as EU integration.
Frustrated with toads
Well, today seems to be turning into a right old link-o-rama. Here we have some sweet, sweet music from Mel. P.
People have understood that the prospect of reforming the EU from within to accommodate the UK's national interest is nil. They therefore think that any politician who promises to do just that is merely yet another lying toad. Their frustration is at boiling point, because they believe that there is not one mainstream political party which is prepared to face up to this honestly and squarely. On this issue, if they are Conservative voters, they have given up on the Tories. That's why they are going to vote UKIP, even though it almost cerrtainly contains individuals who are wacky, fringe politicians and maybe -- round the edges at least -- who hold unsavoury views. People don't care. They want to register their protest, to fire a shot across the bows of mainstream politics to show that they have had enough of the lies and that they want someone -- anyone -- to give them their country back.Everyone's talking about those UKIP guys.
Level 3 VRWC warning
Guys, make sure you don't post any comments or anything at Stephen Pollard's blog for a while just in case it attracts Guardian readers to your own blog.
Oh shit. How do you delete a trackback?
Quote of the day
I know it's early but here it is anyway:
Read pretty well any account of how the British government responds to a threat to its sovereignty from the EU. First they say it is all a scare story. Then they say, well it has been proposed, but it will be resisted to the last gasp. Then they say that the new proposals, while maintaining the name, purpose and structure of the old proposals are in fact completely different than or at least heavily influenced by our tough negotiating stance. Then they swap whatever sacred principle it was for a deal on beetroot. - Natalie Solent
Sean Gabb on voting for the UKIP
Given that I am prevented from quoting Sean Gabb's latest free life commentary in part and given that I have no idea if normal circumstances dictate that he would have been paid a fee for writing it, consequently preventing me from publishing it here in full, I cannot say much except that it argues a case for voting for the UKIP in the European elections.
Rather than waste my time trying to say what Mr. Gabb has said I will wait until it appears as an HTML document on his web site and then I will provide a link.
Next week: How to allow people to spread your message by not preventing them from doing so.
The link is provided.
June 02, 2004
June 01, 2004
Natural History Museum visit - part 3
More pictures from visit by The England Project staff to the Natural History Museum, London. For the whole category click here.
Another unknown.
Iddy biddy baby dinosaurs.
The robotic T-Rex. This one moves about and does a lot of roaring and what-have-you.
Anyway, these are the pictures of the visit, for what they are worth. My dino mojo is still in tatters.
Fobbing off
Talking about tax freedom day and the villagers of Fobbing, reader Andrew wonders:
I suppose this must be the origin of the phrase "to fob off"I hadn't spotted it but I suspect that he is right.