God save our...zzzzzzzzzz

Yes Mat, you're right. It is crap.

Hehe, Gareth shakes it all about over at Anthem4England:

whilst this is all very interesting I must admit that I couldn’t give a rat’s arse what the British anthem is. If I had to pick something then it would be the hokey-cokey, not just for the pure entertainment value but also because it would be a fitting lyrical parody of the Government’s attitude towards British nationalism and identity.

Here dad, do you know the piano is on my foot?

“Right then, can you read music?”

“No.”

“Ok, then I think we’ll begin with that.”

“Actually, can we just go through some chords for a couple of songs and perhaps you can write down some tab to some intros for me? Layla, I quite like that one.”

That was pretty much the opening dialog from my first and last guitar lesson and pretty much sums up my attitude to learning the instrument.

I picked up the guitar about ten years ago, read a beginners book and bought one of those guitar case sized chord books. My intention, my sole intention, was to master the instrument to the point where I could bang out a tune or two while drunk to entertain any of the drink soaked friends that we happened to have around for dinner at the time.

I progressed rapidly and then stopped progressing right about the time that the England Project family were blessed with a little Englander.

I loved the instrument and still do and there is no doubt in my mind that one of these days I will pick it up again to learn new stuff rather than just repeat the brief repertoire that I know now.

It seems to me that my relationship with the guitar is a healthy one. I knew that if I went down the route of, you know, actually learning the thing ‘properly’ it would never figure in my life and my friends would miss out on the best performances of “Wish you were here” they were ever likely to hear. In my kitchen.

This unfortunate situation is exactly the kind I was trying to avoid. Playing should be fun and the intention of learning an instrument should be to have fun with what you know.

My advice to doctorvee is to learn a song that he can play drunk and that others will want to sing when they are also drunk. That is the first step on the path to a cure.

(No, not “Night Swimming” by REM).

Now playing

After a decade of personnel changes and hard-earned journeyman status within the pop world, Fleetwood Mac was faced with the most delightful problem yet -- how to follow up an album that scored quadruple-platinum sales. The answer, of course, was to make an even better one. - Playboy, 1977

I forgot how good Fleetwood Mac's Rumours album is, having rediscovered the CD recently. I don't know who keeps hiding these things but I wish they would stop.

Yes, science fiction is big and heavy rock is clever

Club Tropicana drinks are free.
Fun and sunshine - there's enough for everyone.
All that's missing is the sea.
But don't worry you can suntan.

A few days ago I was asked a few questions about books, which I answered. The same book question and answer session spread through the blogosphere like wildfire and what became all too apparent to me (and undoubtedly my panic stricken readers) was that most of the books I presented in the article seemed, how shall I put this, lacking in political and social calibre. It is true that I read these books purely for entertainment value but it is not true that all that lay within their pages was a desolate wasteland of trivial commentary.

And so it is with much of the music I listen to which has, on occasion, been subjected to criticism which I believe reveals more about the critic than it does about myself.

I am not constrained by any particular genre of music (though there is no question that I do favour some types over others) but my life long fondness for the heavier side of music has been a constant in my life from my early teen years.

At a time when my peers were keenly listening to and buying up as much chart music as their allowances would allow I was the skinny and slightly uncoordinated youth thumbing through the LP’s (LP stands for Long Play – a large flat disk pressed out of vinyl into which groves were cut that magically retained music which could be extracted and played back on demand using a device known as a Record Player) in the heavy rock or metal section. Sometimes I even wondered along to the progressive rock section.

It was a lonely time. That is until I went off to do a degree and discovered a group of kindred spirits who introduced me to the thrill of the open air rock concert. What fun. Often heart thumpingly so. And one of the enjoyable aspects of going to such a concert was the night before the paid minstrels did their thing. The camping in a field full of people who seemed oddly exciting. Hundreds of fires burning, hundreds and hundreds of motorbikes (some weaving in and out of tents), thousands upon thousands of people all drinking and making merry, many showing a keen desire to roam from one campfire to another like some leather clad nomad, sharing stories, telling jokes and generally being nice and sociable. Even the ones that looked terrifying.

So far from even the fringe of mainstream musical opinion these people were all there for the same reason I was. Shunned at school for not knowing the words to Club Tropicana. Chastised at parties for putting on the wrong kind of music and always being told to get our hair cut. The draw of the dark side was irresistible and for me, at the very heart of the compulsion, were the lyrics.

Don’t get me wrong; there are many, many songs in the genre that are embarrassments to their authors but a lyrically strong heavy metal or rock song delivered though high velocity speaker stacks that would not look out of place in a Disaster Area rock concert is simply enthralling. Like my books there is far more to my music than meets the eye.

New blood joins this earth and quickly he's subdued.
Through constant pain disgrace, the young boy learns their rules.
With time the child draws in this whipping boy done wrong.
Deprived of all his thoughts, the young man struggles on and on.
He knows, a vow unto his own that never from this day
His will they'll take away.

Rockroll update

I've put Mugged by Reality on the blogroll. I don't normally announce such things and I've not read any of Dom's stuff (though I will be sure to now). I have no idea of his politics, his style, his rant-rating (and I can't stress how importand rant-rating is). No, something far better qualifies him for the linkage.

We're rock-brothers (read comments).

Play my music anywhere

iTunes is great isn't it? I was watching the recent something or other music awards on TV. A band came on and played a tune I had never heard before and within 5 minutes of having heard it I had it downloaded and, a little later, playing on my iRiver MP3 player. The future is great.

Oh. On an iRiver you say. How so? Well, I like to play my music anywhere which is why jHymn is right up my street.

I know what I like, and I like what I know

I’ve just been reacquainting myself, via iTunes, with an album from my past. It’s easy to forget the pleasures of the music that one grew up with, particularly when that music was of the very early progressive rock variety.

The album in question is Genesis – Live and no, it is probably nothing like the Genesis you know. Apparently the tracks on this live 1973 album were:

extracted from a live performance recorded for the King Biscuit Flower Hour radio show on their [Genesis’s] Foxtrot tour. This is basically the whole set, minus "Supper's Ready," and most of Peter Gabriel's in-between-song banter.

The highlight, I think, is Musical Box (possibly followed by Mike Rutherford’s base peddle solo) which, oddly enough, has been taken as a name by this tribute band who attempt the task of:

re-enacting Genesis’ performances as originally presented between 1973 and 1975.

Nice.

By the way, this is not a recommendation. Early Genesis is not for everybody. Only people with a very highly developed musical intelligence would appreciate it.

Genesis, in my opinion, reached the pinnacle of their abilities with their live album Seconds Out. Yes, it’s Phil Collins singing Peter Gabriel songs and that is exactly the point. Obviously this is before Mr. Collins decided that falling in love really sucks, or whatever it was that made him go all Straight Jacket Required on everybody.

Recent cut

Here's a thing. Bloggers, on occasion, talk about music. Favourite album, current listening, most gross concert experience ever. You know the kind of thing. Well, today on The England Project we begin (and probably end) with a slightly different angle on the thing. Yes, here is TEP's Most recently cut CD. Like iTunes iMix only better.

• Wake up - Rage against the machine
• Ace of spades - Motorhead
• King nothing - Metallica
• Until it sleeps - Metallica
• Bleeding me - Metallica
• Iron fist - Motorhead
• Sad but true - Metallica
• Unforgiven - Metallica
• Bring me to life - Evanescence
• China white - Scorpions

M'kay, too much Metallica perhaps. Then again, perhaps not. It's a Sunday afternoon mood thing.

I've shown you mine.

Musical taste

Here's mine, right out of the 80's in the form of the greatest of the Scorpion albums.

Album: Love at first sting

And now, from the greatest Scorpion album comes the second greatest Scorpions song of all time.

I'm still loving you ...
I'm still loving you ...
I'm still loving you ...
I'm still loving you ...

Still Loving You Baby

Of course, the lack of sound does not do the song justice.

It goes without saying that the greatest ever Scorpions song of all time is China White:

How long will it take
To make the world a flaming star
How long will it take
Till they stop their senseless wars
How long will it take
Till everybody will understand
That we need to fill our hearts with love again

Once again, the lack of sound lets it down. I can tell you though that the guitar riff on this song defines the instrument. Of that there is no question.

So, go on. If you were musically challenged in the 80's and you're a blogger give us a whiff of what you were into. It's good to share.

The talent developing record industry

The UK record industry has, apparently, agreed a deal with play.com which stops it selling CDs sourced from outside of Europe. I have been using play.com for most of my CD purchases for quite some time and was very impressed with their pricing and service.

I’m not sure how this ‘deal’ will affect prices but I suspect that it will not be good news. One of the arguments put forward by the record industry is:

"It is impossible to invest in, develop and market new British talent if we do not protect our legal rights to prevent parallel importing."

Frankly, I think that’s bullshit and who needs these self proclaimed developers of British talent anyway.

Imagine, you and your band can play your instruments really well. You’ve written a whole bunch of great songs that you know people love because you’ve performed the songs to them, you know, live! Now all you need is a break to make the big time.

But wait, your talent hasn’t been ‘developed’ by the record industry so you are nowhere on their radar; not even a smudge. Even worse, the playing field created by the record industry over the past few decades is an expensive one. You actually need the buggers because they have raised the entry price to astronomical levels. The ‘stars’ that they have developed don’t sell themselves you know. They need the best marketing and if you don’t have it too you will be drowned out by the noise, unless you are very lucky.

And if you do get spotted and they decide to help ‘develop’ you further they’ll screw you as you make your music. Then they’ll screw me as I buy it.

The early Darkness

Jamie Diskson in the garage with The Darkness:

I remember Justin writhing on the floor with a guitar in a hilarious parody of Queen guitarist Brian May. The joke would have been unexceptional if he hadn't been thrashing out one of May's famous solos note-for-note.

Franlky, I never remember seeing May behave like this but there you go.

Fruit loops

What a complete waste of time.

BBC Radio 3 will be airing more than four minutes of complete silence on Friday... by design.

The BBC Symphony Orchestra is to give a performance of composer John Cage's seminal piece 4'33", which does not contain a single note.

Ozzy off ventilator

Good news.

Ozzy is a great performer with a massive stage presence. I’ve seen him hold some of the most unruly crowds in the palm of his hand. The ticket above is the one I saved from the last concert I saw him at. No year on it, which is a shame because I can't remember it myself. Back in the 1980's I think.

As for his recent American TV show, the one thing you can say for it is that it does provide the odd humorous insight. For instance when he was at a pre-show sound check or what have you and noticed that the engineers had fit a bubble making machine to the set. As the bubbles were tested the look on Ozzy’s face was a marvel. He opened his mouth and said something along the lines of:

What? What are those? Bubbles! I’m supposed to be the prince of f***ing darkness!!

Brilliant.

Holy cow

This album is brilliant. What's wrong with me?

It was only a few years ago that I was at a Motorhead concert. I've seen Metallica live, Queen's last ever tour, Deep Purple, ZZ Top, Clapton, Pink Floyd and it's come to this. Sweet Lord have mercy.